- I miss being alone. Just really alone, alone. Not “they’re in bed and it’s quiet” or “they are in school/at a playdate/etc. and I have two free hours” just ALONE. With nothing to do.
- I miss being able to read all day long (see above). Something I haven’t been able to do since I was pregnant with Finn.
- I miss not having “mom guilt” about everything. Including about writing this post.
- I miss being able to travel without having a thousand things to pack and/or remember or an astronomical bill for airfare.
- I miss being able to freak out on a plane because I hate flying rather than pretend like it’s all good so I don’t freak the kids out.
- I miss being able to go see the movies whenever I want.
- I miss being able to not be judged on seemingly inconsequential things by other moms, like I most likely will be judged on this piece.
- I miss being able to stay in bed all day when I’m sick.
- I miss being able to go out at night without it being referred to as a “Moms Night Out” or a “Date Night”.
- I miss having that butt (above) without working out five days a week and being able to consider a vegetable calzone to be “healthy”.
- I miss being able to sit on a boat all day long without a care in the world beyond the possibility of being a little hungover for brunch the next day and not needing multiple towels, life jackets, juice boxes and sunscreen options.
- I miss long uninterrupted talks on the phone during the day with friends.
- I miss that unsubstantiated yet glorious feeling of thinking I know what the hell I’m doing most of the time.
- I miss being able to go get Japanese food at 9pm just spur of the moment.
- I miss spur of the moment.
- I miss being lazy and not having a ton of work to make up for lazy moments.
- I miss being able to complain about doing just MY laundry. One person’s laundry. Just me. I can’t believe I ever whined about that.
- I miss having to carve out some “me time” (and not having to call it “me time”) just to take a long shower.
- I miss not having to warn people not to come into the bathroom. Every. Single. Time. I’m. In. There.
- I miss being able to think that the fact that they were sold out of the boots I wanted was a big deal.
- I miss not knowing all the words to the Dora song. Dora Dora Dora the EXPLORER!!!
But, don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t trade one second with my family for a million instances of any of the things I miss. It just feels weirdly good sometimes to be able to recognize that yeah, I miss sleeping in, because it makes me realize just how worth it is to have these little people in my life. There are a million plus ways having kids is the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me, but, that being said, a good vent is good for the soul. Agreed? xoxo
If you only knew how much all of this was going through my mind earlier today. And have the same guilt for thinking/feeling it too… Great post!
AGEED. Honestly, sometimes having kids sucks. Lol. Yup, just plain sucks. Like when I’m pushing the double stroller up Caroline street and am watching a big group of girls go out for a bar crawl. Or I talk to my single friend whose just left the house at noon on a Saturday for brunch. Ahhhhh.. Remember when.
AMEN. Beautifully said.
Oh YES!!! I have felt this way a couple times.
Thank you for sharing this and reading my mind!
I gave birth to twins at almost 39 weeks. To this day, the thing I miss most is having a belly button. RIP. I miss my independence at least once a day. Balancing that against the way I love these tiny humans with every fiber of my being is my biggest mommy conundrum. No judgement here.