There are a LOT of annoying pregnancy questions, as we all know. Some of my favorites? "Are you sure there aren't two in there?" Um yes, yes I'm sure. And the ultrasound technician was sure, as was my doctor, they're not playing an elaborate hoax on me, "Oh hey it's really twins! HAHAHAHA". Just one baby thanks now bye.
Or "Are you done after this one?" Not sure yet, maybe let's wait till this one is actually born to discuss this highly personal question I might not actually want to discuss with you in the first place (I get this one at least twice a day).
But wait, wait for the one that I REALLY cannot stand (and can never understand)...
"Was this planned?"
First off, WHY?! Why would you ask someone this question? Why would you even want to know this information, let alone feel like you are in the right by asking this, out loud, to the other person?
Let's break it down, shall we? Let's say the pregnancy was totally planned, the pregnant person in question perhaps might not feel totally comfortable sharing the details of the family planning they have been doing with their significant other, regardless of how highly planned this baby was. "Um, yeah, we totally planned the sex that involved this baby, any follow up questions for me?".
Secondly, the baby may not have been "planned", and for reasons that you are not entitled to know, maybe there are some difficult feelings involved with the pregnancy, maybe the baby wasn't planned but was a very happy surprise, maybe it isn't quite as rosy as that and they don't want to chat about it with you in the checkout line at Target.
Thirdly, maybe the baby was planned, but the course of that planning did not run as smooth as "We planned to get pregnant and then it happened". Maybe it was years in the making, maybe there were a lot of hardships on the road to pregnancy. The point is, you don't know, this is a highly personal question, so just shut your mouth. That's really the ONLY way to avoid not looking like a total jerk when asking a pregnant woman this question, just don't ask.
But now, I do have to come back to the why. Why even ask? I'm not sure. Curiosity, wanting to make one's one life choices seem justified, wanting to put someone else down in a roundabout way to make up for your own insecurities? I have no idea. But what I do know is, during the potentially highly sensitive time of pregnancy, it's best to keep your questions and comments to yourself. If your pregnant friend feels comfortable enough with you to want to share this stuff with you, she will do so without you needing to prompt her.
Now what about you, what is YOUR most hated pregnancy question or comment?