The Definitive Ranking of the Most Annoying Children's Shows

indexIn my nearly 10 years of parenting young children I have watched a lot of kids tv shows. A LOT. From Barney and beyond, you name it, and chances are one of my four kids has been obsessed with it and I most likely can sing the theme song in my sleep (and probably do most nights). The thing is, all children's shows are not created equal. Some are just SO MUCH MORE ANNOYING than the others. Let's break it down and find out the most annoying, shall we?

For me, I like to call this the "Caillou Scale" because NO ONE IS MORE ANNOYING THAN CAILLOU. He whines, he has no hair for whatever reason, the theme song makes me want to listen to nails on a chalkboard on repeat, and did I mention how much this cartoon child WHINES?! And like, what is with the one cat that can talk and is a real life puppet in some episodes? WHY?! So let's get past that one, Caillou is the worst and is the one that all other horrible shows can be judged against.


Before we get into this, yes, parents who don't let their kids watch tv, I know I can just turn it off. Glad we got that out of the way.

So let's get started, shall we?

Dora the Explorer: I think my main issue with Dora and her pal (cousin?) Diego is the waiting to answer pauses. I'm not sure how many episodes you need to watch, but the fact is you WILL yell an answer back at Diego or Dora at some point "YES DORA I CAN SEE YOUR HOUSE IT IS RIGHT THERE JEEZ". And don't get me started on the map song. WE GET IT YOU'RE THE MAP YOU'RE THE MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPP!"


Wonder Pets: Whenever this comes on I can never remember which one I find the most annoying and then this happens and it all comes back to me...


The Wiggles (or Fresh Beat Band, or anything where grown ups dance around singing): These shows are always awkward for me to watch because I always wonder what these grown people are like when they are not doing the show. Just imagine the dudes from the Wiggles all sitting at a bar, talking about work. It's weird. Me no like.


Max and Ruby: When watching this one I always want to point out to my kids that no one needs to be as bossy as Ruby is but then I remember they don't have parents so I cut her some slack.

So now you tell me, what song do you have on unwanted repeat in your head (I sing the Paw Patrol song without wanting to when brushing my teeth)? What character makes you crazy but is beloved by your child? And is there a show that could actually be worse than Caillou?!