Last week I shared some of the things I can't STAND that people say to a pregnant woman, and I thought it might be a nice balance to point out some nice things you can say to any mom: pregnant moms, moms of teenagers, moms of grown children, no matter what ages your kids are, we all know that special feeling when someone gives you a mom compliment.
Maybe manners are something you've been working on for a while (please and thank you are some of the first phrases I teach our kids), maybe you're just having one of those pregnant days where you feel like a meatball in a sweat lodge (HELLO ME TODAY), maybe you're just plain tired. Now remember a time when someone complimented you on your job as a parent, and how it made you feel like, "You know what? I am doing a good job". I have had strangers give me compliments unexpectedly that left me in tears, in a good way. And there is nothing like when a mom texts you after a play date to tell you that your child was so well behaved and pleasant to have around, or that your child is a good friend, even if that isn't always the case.
So I've made a point to point out these things when I see them too. When my kids have a friend over that is especially kind, the parents deserve a pat on the back for that. When I see a mom and baby laughing in the aisle at Target, I just want to let her know how sweet it is to see. And I LOVE when kids are polite, it's my thing, and I always like to reinforce that with the kids and give the parents a thumbs up, because really, it just feels nice to get that tiny bit of recognition, especially from a fellow parent, whether it's a stranger or a best friend.
Commiserating is great, and we all need to do it sometimes, to hash it all out and complain about the week from hell we are having, but we also need to remember to lift each other up, to shine a little bit of light on someone else's day.
Here are just a few of the favorite things I have heard, and favorite things to say, to reach out and share a little positivity.
"Your child is such a good friend to mine"
"What a happy baby"
"You're doing a great job"
"Your kids have such nice manners"
"You are glowing"
"You are a wonderful mom"
No go forth, and spread a little love, from one mom to another. And you know what? You are doing a great job, mama.